Pretty much.
(Source: fallenforpayne, via bartelsam)
I like my privacy. I don’t need to go off telling the entire world how I’m feeling or what I’m thinking because those things are personal. I’ll tell a certain few, but other than that, nobody else really needs to know. Don’t take it personal that I don’t tell you those things, I just don’t find that it’s necessary to let everyone know when I’m happy or when I’m sad. Or when I have feelings for someone, or when I don’t. Nobody needs to know my life story.
I just want to be acknowledged. A simple hello. That’s it. Just so I can have that reassurance that… I do exist. That I haven’t just disappeared of the face of the planet and you can actually see me. Please….. so I can go back to my life once more.
You wanna know why? Because I’m still hurting. I’m still killing myself over a girl who doesn’t give two shits about me. She doesn’t even care enough to tell me she’s back home, or even say hello. Why do I care so much about someone who couldn’t care less about me? I allow myself to hurt and feel invisible over someone who doesn’t even matter.
And now I don’t even feel like I matter.
When it’s all said and done, I’ll just be another face in the crowd. Another person that you used to know that you now refuse to acknowledge that exists. Go ahead. You know you will. Stop lying to yourself. I’ll just be another person you walk right past. Another memory you choose not to remember. Another one of your ‘mistakes’.
It’s crazy to think that there’s someone out there that is meant to be with me. That someone out there is meant to love me despite all my flaws and faults. That someone I know or do not know yet- is meant to want me over everything else in existence.
Why do I keep doing this to myself? Why do I keep torturing myself? Why don’t I come to my damn senses? If you wanted to talk to me, you would. But you don’t. I was just a fling. I was temporary. I am just a mere memory….
I miss you. I miss you more than these words can explain… But you’re no good for me. I deserve better than what you can give to me. There’s someone out there that’s right for me, and you just… aren’t it. I gave you so much to receive so little in return. I need to stop lying to myself. I need to let you go. I need to get past all of this…. I don’t need you anymore.